The middle of the week, I love the turn of the week. Monday and Tuesday are just like Ive heard described so many times...an uphill climb. Then comes Wednesday when you go over the peak and look at the downhill run. That pretty much describes my week. The beginning of the week I introduce new ideas to my class and we struggle through it then we begin winding those lessons up and coast on into the assessment time. Sometimes a test or a project or an activity that is just meant to be fun but shows me what they learned.
Another reason I really enjoy my Wednesdays and Thursdays is because I do reading groups on those days. It gives me a chance to meet with my students in a small group setting and really work on those individual skills that are needed and also a chance to just enjoy the kids. I love it.
Today we had a tornado drill, the first drills are always so much fun...not. We go out get into position and then we have to see if the students are in the safest place available, it takes a lot of shuffling to find the perfect place...safety is first. I think we did finally get it where everyone was as safe as possible.
Not much has gone on at home, Ive just kicked back and am relaxing. I need to go load the dishwasher and fold the laundry that is in the dryer. Ill get it done before bedtime. Well that's it for my day. Hope everyone has a good Thursday.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
What's Happening
Wow, September since I blogged. I'm so bad at this, probably no one will see this having been deceived into believing I have fall into a dark black hole somewhere and no blogging is allowed. But I have escaped!!
It's been a crazy winter here in NC. We had 2 snow days in January, which we have to make up during Spring Break. BOO!! Very wrong decision but I won't get on my soap box about that tonight. Then March 1st brought us 3 more inches of the lovely white stuff and we had 2 days with 2 hour delays. At least those we dont have to make up. So...Monday, 3 inches of snow and not even up to freezing and by Friday it is supposed to be 72 degrees. Im ready for warm weather.
I was supposed to have gone to FL this last weekend for a surprise baby shower for my youngest sister who is expecting her first baby in April. Yes, Im going to have another nephew, Josiah Jude. I can't wait!! I hope he is here by the time my spring break comes so I can go visit. My other nephew is going to be 21 in April, that is so hard to believe. But I digress, my mom and other sister flew down from IN for the shower and I was supposed to drive down, a 12 hour drive. However, the weekend before I twisted my knee and it still wasnt doing very well and I thought that 12 hours down and 12 hours back probably wouldnt help the cause any so I ended up not going. I did help with the surprise though. Cyndi thought I was the only one coming and that I was just coming to visit. So I called her and asked her to pick me up at the hotel, she had no clue I was sitting in my apt. in NC, I was on the phone with mom when Cyndi got the motel and I heard her say..."What are you doing here?" and "where's Bonnie?" It made me cry but I was happy for her.
My personal life is...well, I dont know what to say about it. I feel like a third wheel in my own life sometimes...lol. There is someone in my life, but I feel, sometimes that he doesnt really have time for me. It's like Im an after thought. I just want to say sometimes "Stop and pay some attention to me" but I tried that before and he got defensive and it led to a big fight. I dont want that. Oh well.
Last November when I went home for Thanksgiving I took my neice to see the move Twilight and after seeing it I wanted to read the book, I read it this weekend, the whole thing then got on amazon.com and ordered the other three sequels. I am waiting impatiently for them to get here so I can read them. I love to read, I can lose myself in the book and forget whats going on in the rest of my life.
I need to get to bed. Maybe Ill have more to say tomorrow.
It's been a crazy winter here in NC. We had 2 snow days in January, which we have to make up during Spring Break. BOO!! Very wrong decision but I won't get on my soap box about that tonight. Then March 1st brought us 3 more inches of the lovely white stuff and we had 2 days with 2 hour delays. At least those we dont have to make up. So...Monday, 3 inches of snow and not even up to freezing and by Friday it is supposed to be 72 degrees. Im ready for warm weather.
I was supposed to have gone to FL this last weekend for a surprise baby shower for my youngest sister who is expecting her first baby in April. Yes, Im going to have another nephew, Josiah Jude. I can't wait!! I hope he is here by the time my spring break comes so I can go visit. My other nephew is going to be 21 in April, that is so hard to believe. But I digress, my mom and other sister flew down from IN for the shower and I was supposed to drive down, a 12 hour drive. However, the weekend before I twisted my knee and it still wasnt doing very well and I thought that 12 hours down and 12 hours back probably wouldnt help the cause any so I ended up not going. I did help with the surprise though. Cyndi thought I was the only one coming and that I was just coming to visit. So I called her and asked her to pick me up at the hotel, she had no clue I was sitting in my apt. in NC, I was on the phone with mom when Cyndi got the motel and I heard her say..."What are you doing here?" and "where's Bonnie?" It made me cry but I was happy for her.
My personal life is...well, I dont know what to say about it. I feel like a third wheel in my own life sometimes...lol. There is someone in my life, but I feel, sometimes that he doesnt really have time for me. It's like Im an after thought. I just want to say sometimes "Stop and pay some attention to me" but I tried that before and he got defensive and it led to a big fight. I dont want that. Oh well.
Last November when I went home for Thanksgiving I took my neice to see the move Twilight and after seeing it I wanted to read the book, I read it this weekend, the whole thing then got on amazon.com and ordered the other three sequels. I am waiting impatiently for them to get here so I can read them. I love to read, I can lose myself in the book and forget whats going on in the rest of my life.
I need to get to bed. Maybe Ill have more to say tomorrow.
Monday, September 8, 2008
Incomplete
I suppose I should fill everyone in on the summer, nothing like doing it late. I had a great summer in Indiana with my family. I stayed up there for 7 weeks, they were probably glad to see me go...lol. Not really, they wanted me to stay, especially my youngest niece, she still calls me once a week and asks when Im coming back, she is counting down the days until Thanksgiving and to be honest I guess I am too!
So...whats new in my life. My younger sister is expecting her first baby in April. She is the one that got married in July 2007, she sent me an email with the first ultrasound pic. She and her husband are very excited as are the rest of us, just wish they weren't clear down in Miami.
Hmmmm school has started again. I have 21 students this year and its so exciting, Im actually in the building, no more standing in all kinds of weather. And there is room to store things...wow.
I think that is it, not too exciting I know. But Im ok without the excitement.
So...whats new in my life. My younger sister is expecting her first baby in April. She is the one that got married in July 2007, she sent me an email with the first ultrasound pic. She and her husband are very excited as are the rest of us, just wish they weren't clear down in Miami.
Hmmmm school has started again. I have 21 students this year and its so exciting, Im actually in the building, no more standing in all kinds of weather. And there is room to store things...wow.
Oh yeah I survived my first tropical storm in NC. It wasnt bad, though there were some trees down and some flooding. I guess several people lost electricity, thank goodness I wasnt one of them.
I think that is it, not too exciting I know. But Im ok without the excitement.
Is it ever ok to Lie
Is it ever ok to lie to someone if you feel it is the best thing for them? Yesterday I lied to someone I care very much about and I know I caused them pain but I also feel it is for the best for them and they will be happier without me. Will we still be friends? I hope so! I can't imagine my life without them there in some capacity.
So why did I lie? Because I think that they were confusing feelings for another with feelings for me. Like the old saying goes...If you love something set it free, if it returns it is yours. If it doesn't, it never was. I would rather bow out gracefully than have them have to tell me that they were wrong about how they felt.
It broke my heart to say the things I said and now I feel an emptiness, a void that I know will not be easily filled. But sometimes I think it is ok to lie.
So why did I lie? Because I think that they were confusing feelings for another with feelings for me. Like the old saying goes...If you love something set it free, if it returns it is yours. If it doesn't, it never was. I would rather bow out gracefully than have them have to tell me that they were wrong about how they felt.
It broke my heart to say the things I said and now I feel an emptiness, a void that I know will not be easily filled. But sometimes I think it is ok to lie.
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Summer Time in Indiana
Everything got packed and I assume that by now my things have been moved into the school building. How refreshing it will be to have an actual classroom instead of being in a mobile unit. I headed for IN on June 19 and am now staying with my sister and her family. It is good to be home, no matter how long I stay in NC, IN will always be home.
My parents headed out yesterday to go to FL to spend a week with my younger sister and her husband. It was a year ago that I was writing blogs about all the preparations for their wedding. Where does time go? Much too fast. I try to tell my nieces and nephew to treasure time and not wish it away but I also remember what it was like to be young. You think older is better and in some ways it is. Anyway, Im not going to go all melancholy here. My sister, brother in law and youngest niece just left to go visit a cousin for a few days. I decided to stay here and my oldest niece opted to stay with me. Im sure she and I will have a good time...if she is ever home. If she isnt Im just going to enjoy some alone time. I love being here with them all but when you are used to living by yourself and pretty much doing what you want when you want it is hard to adjust.
It looks kind of icky outside and they are forecasting storms for the next few days. They definitely so not need it. They are still recovering from all the floods around the area. I was amazed at the damage that was done. It was the 2nd worst flood recorded in this part of the state. Some of the fields had 9 + feet of water in them and roads that had never been closed had to be this time. I saw pictures and just could not believe it. Too bad some of it cannot be sent to the south east where we were experiencing drought conditions.
Wherever you are I hope your days are sunny and that the many showers are blessing.
My parents headed out yesterday to go to FL to spend a week with my younger sister and her husband. It was a year ago that I was writing blogs about all the preparations for their wedding. Where does time go? Much too fast. I try to tell my nieces and nephew to treasure time and not wish it away but I also remember what it was like to be young. You think older is better and in some ways it is. Anyway, Im not going to go all melancholy here. My sister, brother in law and youngest niece just left to go visit a cousin for a few days. I decided to stay here and my oldest niece opted to stay with me. Im sure she and I will have a good time...if she is ever home. If she isnt Im just going to enjoy some alone time. I love being here with them all but when you are used to living by yourself and pretty much doing what you want when you want it is hard to adjust.
It looks kind of icky outside and they are forecasting storms for the next few days. They definitely so not need it. They are still recovering from all the floods around the area. I was amazed at the damage that was done. It was the 2nd worst flood recorded in this part of the state. Some of the fields had 9 + feet of water in them and roads that had never been closed had to be this time. I saw pictures and just could not believe it. Too bad some of it cannot be sent to the south east where we were experiencing drought conditions.
Wherever you are I hope your days are sunny and that the many showers are blessing.
Friday, May 23, 2008
Finally Home
Last Monday I was scheduled for my second electrical cardioversion at 1:45. I was dreading it but not as apprehensive as I had been for the first. At 12:20 two nurses came in and said "You have gone into sinus rhythm on your own. To say I was thrilled would be an understatement. The cardiologist came in about 2:00 and told me to go home. So I came home. The rest of this week has been spent recovering from the days in bed. Im finally getting to the point where Im not totally exhausted but I feel better each day. I am so thankful to God each and every day.
Now what - I am on medication and probably will be for the rest of my life and for the next 2 or 3 months I am on a blood thinner just in case I go back into AFib. Im trusting the great physician on this one.
My mom left this morning, the house seems empty with out her. She spoiled me rotten the two weeks she was here but then she usually does. I have great parents and family.
Well thats all for now
Now what - I am on medication and probably will be for the rest of my life and for the next 2 or 3 months I am on a blood thinner just in case I go back into AFib. Im trusting the great physician on this one.
My mom left this morning, the house seems empty with out her. She spoiled me rotten the two weeks she was here but then she usually does. I have great parents and family.
Well thats all for now
Sunday, May 18, 2008
Still from the hospital bed
Well, my overnight stay for observation has now turned into 6+ nights. The cardioversion on Thursday was unsuccessful. It is successful in 90% of patients but again Im in the minority. Plan of action? They changed the meds I was on and will try the electric cardioversion again tomorrow. If it is not successful again then I will have to be on blood thinners for the rest of my life to prevent clotting which is the biggest risk of AF.
The doctor did go in with a TEE and look at my heart and said it looks good, there is no kind of damage. Thank God for that. Im very thankful for a lot of things, my BP has been excellent, all my blood work is good and other than the rapid heart beat, I seem to be doing all right. My potassium does continue to run on the low side so Im taking horse pills for that every 2 hours. Low potassium could have thrown me into AF but they just arent sure.
I have to say one thing for this hospital, they have the GREATEST staff ever. Everyone is so kind and takes the time to see to all of my needs including my emotions which have been off the wall. Today I am fighting depression and had to make myself get up and do something. What I would really like to do is lay down and just sleep. I dont want to eat or watch tv or read or even play on the computer but I make myself because I know that getting depressed wont help matters any at this point.
More later, but hopefully not from the hospital.
The doctor did go in with a TEE and look at my heart and said it looks good, there is no kind of damage. Thank God for that. Im very thankful for a lot of things, my BP has been excellent, all my blood work is good and other than the rapid heart beat, I seem to be doing all right. My potassium does continue to run on the low side so Im taking horse pills for that every 2 hours. Low potassium could have thrown me into AF but they just arent sure.
I have to say one thing for this hospital, they have the GREATEST staff ever. Everyone is so kind and takes the time to see to all of my needs including my emotions which have been off the wall. Today I am fighting depression and had to make myself get up and do something. What I would really like to do is lay down and just sleep. I dont want to eat or watch tv or read or even play on the computer but I make myself because I know that getting depressed wont help matters any at this point.
More later, but hopefully not from the hospital.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
From the Hospital Bed
I am writing this blog from the Wake Med heart center in Raleigh NC. That sounds scarier than it is...well, not for me because I get panicky at every little thing. Last Saturday I had another episode of my heart racing. Ive had these before but normally they only last 30 - 60 minutes, followed by two or three hours of exhaustion. But Saturday was different, it lasted much longer, continued off and on on Sunday and then again on Monday, which was my 44th birthday.
Anyway, I went to see my doctor on Monday. He wasnt in but his nurse practitioner was and she listened to my heart and immediately said..."We are doing an EKG." Then she went and got the other doctor on duty and he came in and told me I was in atrial fiberllation. Of course, I didnt know what that was and nearly panicked until he told me it was something that millions of people live normal lives with, even naming a couple of celebrities like basketball great Larry Byrd. He then proceded to tell me he wanted me in the hospital overnight for observation and they called an ambulance and off I went.
First they put me on an IV of a drug to try and convert back to normal rhythm, successful in 50% of patients, well guess who isnt in that 50% so it took until last night to get the beat normal and today I am having a cardioversion using electricity, yes they are shocking back into regular rhythm. Then I will have to take meds to try and keep it from happening again. I will probably remain in the hospital until Sat or Sun. My mom and sister came down to be with me, thank you God. My poor mom had a bad night last night because *I* was running in panic mode.
It is now 2 hours before the procedure begins and I feel like Im about to jump out of my skin. I cant believe how nervous I am when everyone tells me how common this is and how low risk. Why do I always see the glass as half empty, and why is my faith so weak that I cant trust God to make the best decisions for me. I just dont know.
I will write more on how the procedure went later.
Anyway, I went to see my doctor on Monday. He wasnt in but his nurse practitioner was and she listened to my heart and immediately said..."We are doing an EKG." Then she went and got the other doctor on duty and he came in and told me I was in atrial fiberllation. Of course, I didnt know what that was and nearly panicked until he told me it was something that millions of people live normal lives with, even naming a couple of celebrities like basketball great Larry Byrd. He then proceded to tell me he wanted me in the hospital overnight for observation and they called an ambulance and off I went.
First they put me on an IV of a drug to try and convert back to normal rhythm, successful in 50% of patients, well guess who isnt in that 50% so it took until last night to get the beat normal and today I am having a cardioversion using electricity, yes they are shocking back into regular rhythm. Then I will have to take meds to try and keep it from happening again. I will probably remain in the hospital until Sat or Sun. My mom and sister came down to be with me, thank you God. My poor mom had a bad night last night because *I* was running in panic mode.
It is now 2 hours before the procedure begins and I feel like Im about to jump out of my skin. I cant believe how nervous I am when everyone tells me how common this is and how low risk. Why do I always see the glass as half empty, and why is my faith so weak that I cant trust God to make the best decisions for me. I just dont know.
I will write more on how the procedure went later.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
No Heart for Blogging
After my aunt Shirley's death in December and all the subsequent things that happened in my life I sank into a self imposed prison of depression. I was so homesick for Indiana that I could hardly stand it and all I could think of was being with my family. I finally broke in mid March when my dad's oldest sister, Jean, passed away. She died on March 16 and when I went to work on the 17th I just couldnt handle it. After talking to the principal and vice principal I took the 3 days left of that week and, thankfully the next week was spring break, went home. I got to attend my aunt's funeral and spend time with my family. I came back to NC with a much healthier attitude and the depression is seemingly gone. I think I needed to closure.
As for rest of what is going on with me. The school where I teach is splitting next year. We just recently found out that our principal will be going to the new school along with one of our assistant principals, while the other asst principal will become the principal at our school. Staff will be split between the two schools but we probably wont know until about the end of April which school we will be out. I put our current school as my choice simply because it is closer to where I live but I dont know home much consideration will be given to what we prefer. Either way I feel comfortable with administration in either school.
Speaking of school, it is that time of year where the kids are sick of the teachers and the teachers are sick of the kids. Little spats between students are common and the teachers have short fuses. 41 days left, not that Im counting.
Well that is really all that is going on here so for now Ill say "keep on keeping on"
As for rest of what is going on with me. The school where I teach is splitting next year. We just recently found out that our principal will be going to the new school along with one of our assistant principals, while the other asst principal will become the principal at our school. Staff will be split between the two schools but we probably wont know until about the end of April which school we will be out. I put our current school as my choice simply because it is closer to where I live but I dont know home much consideration will be given to what we prefer. Either way I feel comfortable with administration in either school.
Speaking of school, it is that time of year where the kids are sick of the teachers and the teachers are sick of the kids. Little spats between students are common and the teachers have short fuses. 41 days left, not that Im counting.
Well that is really all that is going on here so for now Ill say "keep on keeping on"
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